This is a Recap of Lost Season 6 Episode 9 entitled “Ab Aeterno”, originally airing March 24, 2010. It’s full of spoilers, so don’t read on if you don’t know that the island is hell. I’m not joking this time, they actually said that! But it’s also not really! Huh?? That’s why we have these Recaps.
CANARY
DIE
-LANDS, THE CRYPT KEEPER MIGHT SAY
Two weeks after “Dr. Linus”, maybe the best episode of Season 6 so far,
Lost
punched us in the crotch with a Spanish
Richard Alpert
backstory, and all the sudden, the title of “Best Episode Of The Season” has been passed right along yet again. Where did this episode come from? Or should I say, WHEN did this episode come from? No, never mind, the first one. Let’s delve into the Spanish zaniness and find out!
The episode opens with the islanders convening to re-explain the candidates thing and reminding themselves what’s going on before Richard blows up and confesses that he was trying to kill himself, and unambiguously explains that he has no plan, everyone is dead, and the island is hell. Whew! Been waiting to hear that for six years! It’s all solved now. OR IS IT??? DAMMIT! I was hoping I wouldn’t type “Or is it?” after saying that it is all solved. No, it’s not at all solved now, because they’re not dead and it’s not hell, or at least, not hell in the textbook “hell” sense (from the hell textbook). Explanation? Let’s go to the tape, by which I mean the long-awaited Richard Alpert backstory.
Richard, formerly known as “Ricardo”, and more formerly known as “James Ford”, is tending to his ailing wife in a late 19th century period piece about the Canary Islands. He rides through the rain to meet the local doctor / aristocrat / assh*le, who explains that he’s not gonna make a trip all the way out to some stupid dying woman and miss the Canary Islands Idol results show, so he offers up some medicine that’s so expensive, Richard’s measly pouch of coins and sentimental-ass cross pendant merely insult the doctor.
An exasperated Richard decides, “If I push you a little maybe it’ll solve this!” and pushes the doctor, who falls, hits his head, and dies instantly — He can save the lives of others, but the only life he can’t save…IS HIS OWN.
The Doctor
. May 2010. — and Ricardo snags the meds and rushes home, only to find that his wife has already died. Whatta day! Suddenly, he doesn’t feel as bad about leaving the cap off his mostly-full guyliner tube the day before.
Richard is arrested and throws himself at the mercy of a priest, who explains he’ll need a whole lifetime of servitude to atone for his deeds, and Richard’s like, “You got it, anything for God,” and the father’s like “Psych! We’re hanging you in three minutes!” Richard catches a break when an English-speaking ship captain recruits him for an expedition to crash into the island statue, and the expedition wildly succeeds, leaving the vessel — guess which vessel! The Black Rock! — wrecked on the island with the slaves trapped below.
Then what happens? Read on below to find out! Though if you don’t already know and you’re still reading this, you must just be a huge fan of looking at words!
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