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02 Sep 2000 - 01 Nov 2023

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TIMESTAMPS

For The Week Of 6/5/2000 to 6/9/2000

• Various Stuff. 6/5/00. 6:05am
  Howard said he was happy to be in this morning.. To see Gary's giant teeth and jackie's weather-beaten face. He said he spent the weekend drinking and getting drunk. He was out with Crazy Cabbie once again so he ended up coming in and talking about some of his wacky stories. Cabbie is a recovering alcoholic and Howard said he almost fell off the wagon while they were out together. Howard said Cabbie was sniffing his frozen margarita. Cabbie said he used to drink and use crack years ago but he's done with that now. He has sober friends he can call when he gets the urge to drink now. Howard told Cabbie that if he does start drinking again he should do it on his show.

  Howard said Cabbie was out with a woman over the weekend so he shared his story. Cabbie said that she was really attractive but when they went and hung out in Central Park he found out that her ass was huge. She's a hot looking doctor according to Cabbie but her ass was just too big for him. He said he'd be friends with her but wouldn't have sex with her. The woman called in a little later and said that Cabbie already knew that they weren't going to be anymore than friends and it wasn't really a date that they went on. They were just hanging out. Howard said he got a completely different story from Cabbie off the air. Cabbie kept talking about how big her ass was even while she was on the phone. She said she'd still hang out with him though. She said that she's working out now and she'll have a nice tight ass in a couple of months while Cabbie will still be fat.

  Howard was talking about what he was drinking at this bar Citrus over the weekend and he made it sound like he'd discovered something new. He was drinking frozen margaritas like it was something that just came out. Everyone told him that they've been around for a long time. He said they were really good because they're made with all natural stuff instead of a margarita mix.

  Howard took a couple of phone calls from people who wanted to comment on Cabbie. For some reason quite a few people hate when he's on the air. He's become the Ralph of the new millennium. One guy asked that Howard get him off the air. A couple of other callers said they like when he's on. They enjoy his openness. Howard said he likes having him on but has heard from quite a few people that they don't like Cabbie.

  Later in the show Howard was talking about how he bought the ''National Examiner'' because there was a headline reading ''Mr. Ed A Zebra!'' He read the article to Robin and soon found out that it was a bunch of crap just to get people to buy the rag. It said that some web site about urban legends mentioned that he may have been a zebra but the Examiner confirmed that Mr. Ed was really a horse.

  Howard brought up the movie ''Mission Impossible 2'' which he saw recently. He said it was really bad and couldn't believe how much money it made. What blew his mind even more was the fact that in it's first weekend ''Big Momma's House'' almost beat out ''Mission Impossible 2''. He said he just can't figure out movies these days.

• John's Intern Horror Story. 6/5/00. 6:45am
  An ex-intern by the name of John Flanagan called in this morning to tell Howard about a run-in he had with Scott the Engineer. He interned for the station back in the fall of '99 but didn't work for Scott. He came back to help out the E! crew when they were working on Howard's birthday show a few months back. He was in charge of handing out credentials to the E! people so they could get into the event. He said that, for some reason, Scott was unable to get in because he didn't have his credentials. Scott came over to John and kind of yelled at him asking him for credentials. John had to go in to the event and ask someone else for Scott's stuff but they said that he should have already had them. John was volunteering for this and didn't even want to deal with it but he did it anyway. Scott came in the studio and said that he wasn't really yelling at John, he was yelling at the situation. John then said that Scott came up to him and apologized but a couple of minutes later he asked him to help them break down the equipment. John made up an excuse about having to help the E! crew. It wasn't really much of a horror story, was it?

• Chris' Celebrity Fecal Samples. 6/5/00. 7:00am
  This guy Chris called in to tell Howard that he has celebrity fecal samples he collected while working in a lab that did testing. He wants to auction them off for charity or something on the show. Howard thought that he had pieces of fecal matter but all it turns out to be is smears of the celebrity's poo. Chris claims to have samples of Marissa Tomei, Tony Randall, Michael Douglas, Charlie Sheen and Robert Loggia. He didn't have a list in front of him so he didn't know all 20 names that he has. He keeps them in a refrigerator in his house and claims that his girlfriend doesn't even know he has them. He said that Tony Randall's was the worst smelling of them all. He said he only smelled them one time when he was testing them. He said he doesn't take them out to smell them or anything like that. He may come on the show to do something with them but Howard's not sure he wants to get involved with it. He's not sure you can prove who's crap it really is. Chris plugged some appearance he's got going on for his band Facial. You can find out more about the band at FacialBand.com

• Farters Oprah Windfrey And Tonya Farting. 6/5/00. 8:15am
  Howard was expecting to have 2 women who weighed over 300 pounds come in to fart for him. When the ''women'' came in Howard was surprised to see that one of them was a man dressed as a woman. He was talking like a woman so Howard asked him to stop it but the guy wouldn't. He continued to speak in a (barely) feminine voice the whole time. He claimed that he was doing it because he's an actress. Howard just wanted the two of them to fart so he had Tonya do it. She squeezed out a couple of little ones but they sucked. Oprah was unable to fart at all so Howard wondered why he even had these two in the studio. Oprah's nuts were hanging out of his thong and it was freaking Howard out. He told him to tuck them back in but the guy was just so weird that he kept rambling. After about 5 minutes he booted the two of them out of the studio. They were trying to plug this album ''
• Pull My Finger '' that they're on(tracks 55 and 69) but I don't think anyone cared. You can also find out more about the album at PullMyFinger.com

• When Good TV Shows Go Bad. 6/5/00. 8:25am
  A few weeks ago Howard was talking about this web site JumpTheShark.com where people discuss when their favorite TV shows go bad. Today Gary came in with a whole list of shows that he found on the site. Gary and the rest of the crew discussed a few of them. The guy who started the site called in at one point. He told Howard that he just does it as a hobby and it's become a huge hit. He doesn't even make any money off the site. Gary brought up shows like:
  • Gilligan's Island
  • Mary Tyler Moore
  • Sanford and Son
  • Star Trek
  • The Jeffersons
  • Leave It To Beaver
  • Fantasy Island
  • Good Times
  • Charlies Angels
  • Three's Company
  • Cheers
  • Barney Miller
  • MASH
  When the creator of the site called in he asked Howard to come up with a show that never went bad while it was on. He and Gary said that shows like ''The Larry Sanders Show'', ''The Munsters'', ''Mr. Ed'' and ''The Adams Family'' never really went bad. The guy from JumpTheShark.com also said that ''The Simpsons'' has been consistently good since it started out also. Howard and Robin have never gotten into the show so they wouldn't know.

• The Hilarious Enrique Iglesias Tape. 6/5/00. 8:40am
  Howard was about to play some tapes of everyone's first day on the show that he's been promoting for weeks when he remembered something better. He has tape of what's apparently Enrique Iglesias' live board feed from a performance he did. He was singing along with the studio recording of his song, in other words.. lip syncing, when this tape was caught. Howard played it and the guy can't sing worth a damn. He's off key, out of breath and basically just making a fool out of himself. Howard and the rest of the guys were laughing hysterically at how bad he was. Howard said that if this is really him they have to get him on the show. He said he was never a fan of Enrique but now that he's heard this tape he's a fan. Stuttering John said he got the tape from someone in the music industry so it's very possible that it's really Enrique. Robin said that she'd heard about this tape and thinks that it's real also. Howard must have played the tape about 5 times. Each time it got funnier to him.

• Vaginosis Discussion. 6/5/00. 8:55am
  This woman called in to let Howard know that she was cured of the dreaded vaginosis. This is when a woman has a stink ''down under'' that can make a man puke. She said her husband used to complain about her stink all the time and would turn on a fan to drive the smell away from his nose while they were having sex. She said she went to a gynecologist who prescribed something called ''L. acidophilus'' or something like that. She said the smell went away in one day. This led to a discussion about the smell and other smells that might accompany it. Howard said that sometimes the ass smell gets mixed in there. KC said that vaginosis is worse than the smell of ass. Howard told a story about being at Scores getting a lap dance and when the stripper waved her ass in his face he caught a whiff of ass. Doug from E! came in and said that a friend of his picked up a really hot woman one time but when he ''went downtown'' on her he ended up vomiting on her because she smelled so bad.

• Jessica Hahn Calls In. 6/5/00. 9:05am
  During the vaginosis discussion Howard's old friend Jessica Hahn called in. She was calling in to apologize to Gary for some reason. She'd yelled at him over something that he had nothing to do with and she felt bad about it so she apologized for it. Howard said that he was just talking to one of his friends about Jessica yesterday. He was talking about how well Jessica has held up over the years. Everyone thought she was going to fall apart and probably kill herself but she's done well. She hooked up with the creator of ''Married with Children'' and doesn't have to work now. She has her own house and visits the guy like 3 times a week while she gets a monthly ''allowance'' to support her. She said she's all set for life. She doesn't have to work at all now. Howard reminded everyone how good Jessica is in bed and how she uses a man's penis as a pacifier when she's going to sleep. She brought up the vaginosis thing and said that women need to use a bidet to clean themselves out to keep the smell away. She brought up the time that Howard told her she had a smelly belly button and she ended up freaking out and crying about it. She hates to stink and knows how to avoid it. She said she uses Huggies wipes to clean herself after she uses the bathroom. She told Howard that the one time he told her that panty hose weren't sexy she listened and hasn't worn them since. She never wears panties either. Howard remembered one time he was out dancing with Jessica he lifted up her skirt and let everyone else in the place see Jessica's naked ass.

• Various Stuff. 6/6/00. 6:05am
  Howard was kind of crabby this morning. He said that he barely got any sleep last night. There were window cleaner's ropes hanging in front of his window being blown against it by the wind during the night. He said he had to change rooms and only got about 4 hours of sleep. He said there was no one to call last night but he'll be making a call today about the problem. He was really upset because he didn't look that good for Shannon Elizabeth because of his limited amount of sleep.

  A bunch of people were calling in to talk about ''Son of the Beach'' star Jaime Bergman being in the latest ''Playboy'' magazine. Everyone said she looks really hot being all naked in the magazine. One guy said he's been pleasuring himself to the pictures quite a bit since he got it on Sunday. Howard is upset that Fred Durst of Limp Bizkit is dating her now. He said that Jaime is a really sweet person and he's just jealous that Fred is getting her.

  Howard spent a couple of minutes talking about what a ''dud'' last week's Jackpot.com Million Dollar winner turned out to be. He played a quick tape of an interview that was done with him. The newscaster tried to get Dwayne to talk about what it was like to win the million bucks but he had very little to say. He seems very ''blase'' according to Howard.

  Jessica Hahn called in again this morning because Howard had mentioned her a little earlier in the show. Someone had mentioned how Jessica used to be on Howard's ''list'' of women he'd like to be with if he ever left his wife. He said ''things change'' and brought up how Jessica is now with someone and he's not. She called in to talk about the good times from years ago and how he should find a woman who is self sufficient and sweet.

• Gary Garver Celebrity Interviews. 6/6/00. 7:00am
  Gary Garver was out at the MTV Movie Awards show and got interviews with singer Aaliyah, Verne Troyer, 2 of the Wayans brothers and James Hetfield of Metallica. Aaliyah was up first..
  • What's the hardest part about acting? - becoming another person
  • Would you ever do full frontal nudity in a movie? - not thinking about that now, don't think so
  • Would you ever get breast implants? - No
  • Would you ever pose naked for Playboy? - Oh my god, these questions.. They're totally out of bounds.. The purpose, I don't get it
  • Cock and balls? - Pardon me
  • Would you ever date Howard Stern? - I think he's da bomb
  Verne, also known as ''Mini Me'', only made it through a couple of questions before vanishing. Here are his questions:
  • Would you ever do full frontal nudity in a movie? - Hell no
  • Cock and balls? - Exactly
  • Have you ever masturbated in your dressing room? - Verne vanished
  Two of the Wayans brothers were interviewed but no one was sure which two they were. They were talking all over each other during the answers..
  • What's the hardest part abut acting? - The girls...acting when you can't act
  • Would you ever do full frontal nudity in a movie? - I just did it in two, yes I would
  • Have you ever masturbated in a dressing room? - No.. I've masturbated on my way to the dressing room
  • Cock and balls? - Huh?.. wha's cock and balls?
  • Which term for gays is more offensive, Queer, Fag or Pillow Biter? - Pillow Biter is hilarious.. I could see a gay guy getting upset about Queer or Fag..
  • Why isn't Howard Stern invited to this event? - Cause he would call people Queer and Fat.. because of those questions.. He's crazy, I love him though
  Last up was James Hetfield. He stuck it out through all of the questions:
  • What was your favorite song this year? - Out of all songs.. uh.. I kind of like ours actually
  • Would you ever do full frontal nudity in a movie? - Again?.. No, I don't think my kids would need to see that
  • Which term for gays is more offensive, Queer, Fag or Pillow Biter? - Wow, I could think of a few worse ones.. I'd have to say no comment actually
  • Have you ever masturbated in your dressing room? - What station is this? This is some queer station ain't it..
  • Cock and balls? - Cock or balls? I have both..
  • Why isn't Howard Stern invited to this event? - I don't know.. He's a friend of ours, he's okay..
  • Do you think Rosie O'Donnell is a hypocrite for sending a kid to school with an armed body guard? - Uh, I've got a few things to say about her but not in the press.

• Enrique Iglesias Tape Controversy. 6/6/00. 7:10am
  Yesterday Howard played this tape that may or may not be Enrique Iglesias singing horribly. Today there was an article in the paper which described the tape and had quotes from Enrique's publicist. The publicist didn't say that it definitely wasn't his client. He said it's possible but Enrique has proven himself on certain shows in the United States. He's been on Jay Leno a couple of times and sang live. The publicist didn't really say that Enrique is a great singer though. He just said that Enrique has ''proven himself'' in various places. Gary came in and said that he heard from the publicist and Enrique is thinking about coming on the show to sing live to prove that he can sing. Howard played the tape a couple more times this morning and even compared it to the album version of ''Rhythm Divine''. He played the two of them side by side and most people are thinking that it's the same guy. Howard is saying that he thinks it is Enrique and they may have uncovered another Milli Vanilli scandal.

• Shannon Elizabeth Comes In. 6/6/00. 7:40am
  Actress Shannon Elizabeth ('' American Pie '') came in this morning to plug a couple of things. Howard brought her in early to talk about working with Enrique Iglesias in a music video but ended up talking to her about other stuff first. Howard had read an article where it said Shannon wished that she'd lost her virginity to him. She said that was true and that she really likes long hair. She also said that Howard is always talking about his small penis so she figured that would have been good for losing her virginity. Shannon is engaged now so Howard is out of luck. She's only 23 so Howard was asking her why she'd get married so young. She says it's because she's in love but Howard tried to talk some sense into her. She eventually said that she would stay engaged for a few years to make sure it's the right thing to do. When she was asked if she knows any couples that are happily married. She said that her parents are still married.. ''but are they happy?'' Robin asked. Shannon just laughed.

  Howard had to ask her if her breasts were real or implants. She swears that they're real but Fred argued that they're too perky to be real. Howard pointed out that she's only 23 so it's possible that they are real. Fred said that he's read things about her and thinks that she admitted that they're fake.

  After taking a break Howard came back with Shannon and described that she was wearing a ''hippie outfit'' of a peasant shirt showing off her belly and hip hugger pants. Howard said he tried coming on to her during the commercial break but nothing was happening.

  Howard then moved on to talk about her working with Enrique Iglesias in one of his video's. He played some of the tape of him for her and asked her if she thinks it's actually him. She said that on the set he was singing along with the song and she heard him. She thinks that the tape is a fake. She told Howard that she tried calling Enrique today but he's in Italy so she couldn't reach him. She's friends with him and said that she will encourage him to come on the show to sing for Howard.

  Howard got back to Shannon's sex life and asked her if she's been with other men in her life. She was very reluctant to answer the question but eventually said that she has been with other guys. She lost her virginity at 16.

  By this time Howard was plugging her upcoming movie ''Scary Movie'' which is a spoof of scary movies done by Keenan Ivory Wayans. Howard wanted to know if she gets naked in it like she did in ''American Pie''. She wouldn't tell him. She just said that you have to see the movie yourself to see if she gets topless. She then started to tell Howard that she doesn't want to do that for her whole career. She wants people to see her talent instead of her breasts. Howard was then checking out the pictures of her in ''Playboy'' that she did around the time of the release of ''American Pie''. He thinks they look real but Ralph called in and said that he was just reviewing the tape. He said when she lies down on the bed her breasts don't move so they've got to be fake. Howard then had her swear on her mother's life that they're real and she did it.

  Howard also asked her about the masturbation scene in the movie and in a round about way said that it was a real scene. She said that she's a ''method actress'' so Howard took that as meaning she actually did it.

  A couple of callers told Howard that he should bang Shannon but her boyfriend is in town with her and he's not going to try and steal her away. Shannon was asked if she would go out with Howard if she was single and she said she would. She said she doesn't mind going out to dinner to get to know someone better. She thinks she's still going to do that after she gets married.

  Howard also plugged Shannon's web site ShannonElizabeth.com which he said is pretty slick. He was on it last night but there weren't any nude pictures there. She said she's an actress and doesn't want people looking at her for that. Both he and Ralph warned her about that. They both told her that guys want to look at her body because she's hot. They don't care about her acting. She said her site will have a live web cam broadcast this Sunday but don't look for her to get naked. Shannon is also the new spokesperson for Nautica clothing.

  Howard and Ralph were discussing how Cindy Margolis won't even get into a bikini now and that's the only reason people want to see her. Howard read an E! online list of the most downloaded people on there and Cindy Margolis came in last place. Howard said that he's always thought that her being the ''most downloaded'' person on the web was a bunch of crap and that proved it. He said that he likes Cindy but she's nuts to think that she's the most downloaded. He and Ralph both tried to tell Shannon that she's heading down the same road as Cindy if she stops getting naked in her movies. She said she hasn't stopped yet and that you have to see ''Scary Movie''.

  Gary came in at one point and said that Shannon really had to leave to go do Regis and Kathie Lee. Howard told Gary to screw Regis and Kathie Lee and kept talking to Shannon. The publicist was freaking out so Howard wanted her to come in. She refused so Howard held on to Shannon and said that it was going to be a stand off until the publicist came in. After a few minutes the publicist left the building! She wanted nothing to do with it and actually left. Howard eventually told Shannon that she'd better go. Gary was kind of freaking out because the publicist is from a big firm and he didn't want Howard pissing her off. Howard asked Shannon to walk out slowly so that he could ''finish'' himself off.

• Peaches Comes In For Kathie Lee's Job. 6/6/00. 8:40am
  This 35 year old woman Peaches called in a couple of weeks back and told Howard that she wanted to be Kathie Lee's replacement. Howard asked her a few questions and thought she might make a good replacement so he invited her in. What a mistake! When she came in Howard said she was pretty good looking. He quickly tried to get into an audition type of thing where he was doing his Regis impression and asking her questions. He asked her thinks like what she did last night and what types of drugs she likes to do. For some reason Peaches got really defensive and refused to answer the questions without questioning why Howard was asking them. She kept saying that Regis wouldn't ask questions like that. He tried over and over again to try and get her to talk about her drug usage and she just wouldn't do it. Howard told her that she was really bad at this and that he must have been mistaken when he thought that she would be a good replacement for Kathie Lee.

  She eventually changed her tune a little bit and started to answer the questions but she was still being sarcastic with her answers. Howard gave up and tried to just talk to her but even that was tough. He told her that she was good looking but after she said that he was too old to date her he came back with an insult of his own. He told her that she only wishes that she was only 35 and that she's 35 in dog years. By the end of it she was all bummed out and almost in tears. Howard tried one more time to do the audition but she was still making dopey comments so he gave up again.

  Howard felt sorry for Peaches so he let her go relax in the green room while he took a break. He invited her back to play a quick game of ''Turkish Millionaire'' to win a prize. She had to get 5 questions correct to win the $1200 Tag Heur watch. Here are her questions:

  1. Name the two main candidates running for President - George Bush Jr. and Al Gore
  2. What party is President Clinton in? - Democratic
  3. Who made the ''I have a dream'' speech? - Martin Luther King
  4. What fruit hit Newton on the head? - Fig.. Apple
  5. Who discovered electricity? - Benjamin Franklin
  Peaches almost lost it on the Newton question when she answered ''fig''.. Thinking of Fig Newtons I guess. Jackie laughed out loud when she answered so Howard gave her the chance to change it to the correct answer of apple. Howard once again told Peaches that he found her attractive and ended it. She told him to come see her at VIP's strip club sometime. She said she'd be there any night that Howard wanted her to be.

• Howard Endorses Dick Zimmer. 6/6/00. 9:50am
  Howard said he received word from Dick Zimmer from New Jersey that he's running against this guy Mike Pappas for the republican nomination for the 12th congressional district. He tells Howard that Pappas is against abortion so Howard said he'd back Dick. He said that Pappas has quoted Howard as supporting abortion but Howard is proud to do that. After a few minutes of talking up Dick he said ''I like Dick!'' It was pretty catchy so he repeated it over and over again.. ''I like Dick!.. I like Dick!.. I like Dick!'' He then went on to say ''Abort Mike Pappas' political career!'' He also came up with ''We can put Dick in!'' and ''Dick's got a head on.'' Robin even came up with one, ''Put Dick in the seat!'' Dick jokes are great, aren't they?

• Enrique To Perform Live For Howard. 6/7/00. 6:05am
  Enrique Iglesias will be on tomorrow's show to perform live in front of Howard to prove that he can sing. Howard's been playing this controversial tape of what's supposed to be Enrique singing really poorly. Apparently Gary says that this is a big deal for Enrique because he's over in Italy performing concerts and he has to fly back to the States just to do this performance. Howard played the tape again this morning and said that, no matter what, he'll still prefer that version(the tape) of the song. Tune in tomorrow to find out whether Enrique can actually sing.

• Various Stuff. 6/7/00. 6:15am
  Howard took a few phone calls this morning and one of them was from someone out in Los Angeles. He told Howard that the station out there is hacking up the show really bad. Howard said he knows about it and he's trying to put a stop to it. This led to him complaining about working at his own station and how he's really sick of the delay button getting hit on stupid things. He started to tell Robin about what it was hit for the other day but it was hit once again while he was telling her. He said that he's sick of this guy Andre who's in charge of censoring the show. He said it's the ''enemy within'' and when his contract is up in 7 months he's gone. He said that he has a plan to get rid of all of the problems in his life but didn't share it with us. It sounds like he may be done with CBS/Infinity at the end of his contract though.

  Howard let everyone in New Jersey know that his endorsement of Dick Zimmer late in the show yesterday seemed to have helped him win the race against Mike Pappas. He gave Pappas a message and called him a douche bag.

  Gary came in with another dopey game this morning. ''Entertainment Weekly'' came out with a list of people who have appeared on the cover of the magazine over the past 10 years. Gary saw that Howard was on it 3 times so he had a quiz about who's been on the cover more, Howard or...

  • Backstreet Boys - 2
  • Ralph Fiennes - 4
  • Tom Selleck - 2
  • Val Kilmer - 5
  • Billy Crystal - 2
  • Paul Simon - 2
  • Daniel Day Lewis - 2
  • Goldie Hawn - 2
  • The raptor from Jurassic Park - 4
  • Sarah Jessica Parker - 1
  • Woody Allen - 3
  • Warren Beatty - 3
  • William Shatner - 3
  • Julia Roberts - 39
  • Tom Cruise - 36
  Howard got sick of the dumb game pretty quick and let Gary know just how dumb it was. He gave up on it and moved on to other things.

  Howard said that the new CBS show ''Survivor'' is on again tonight and he's seen a preview copy of it. He said it's really good and the people are eating rats and some kind of bug that may or may not be a grub of some type. He said it's pretty disgusting to watch. Vinnie Favale from CBS called in to help promote the show but didn't have much to add to the discussion.

  The subject of Stuttering John's ass came up while Howard was talking about how he can lose weight.. by not eating. John has had problems with his butt lately and Howard tells him it's got to be his diet. John doesn't want to believe that and just continues to eat crappy food and drink alcohol. Howard wonders why he wouldn't just give it up for a short time to see if it helps his ass out. John doesn't want to give up any of his eating habits and certainly not his alcohol consumption.

• Richard Rubacher's Backwards Messages. 6/7/00. 7:20am
  In the past weeks Howard has played these tapes of backwards messages things that Jon Benet Ramsey and her parents have said. This guy Richard Rubacher found the messages and wrote a book about them called ''Jon Benet Knows Evil Love''. He called in this morning to discuss them with Howard. Howard went through some of the tapes with the guy. In one tape Jon Benet sings a song. When it's played backwards you can hear her say something like ''I know evil love''. Richard claims that these messages come from the subconscious mind. Howard also played tapes of both John and Patsy Ramsey talking about stuff and you can hear backwards messages in those also. Richard claims that in the backwards messages Patsy says that it was an accidental murder. John Ramsey allegedly says that he's a bad person in one message.

  Richard also has tapes of other celebrities like Whitney Houston, Maria Shriver and George Bush saying strange things when you play them backwards. You can find out more about all of this at Richard's web site EvilLoveJonBenet.com

• Polish Radio DJ Calls Howard About Enrique. 6/7/00. 7:55am
  Howard took a call from a Polish radio DJ who wanted to talk to Howard about the whole Enrique Iglesias thing. The DJ, Martin, said that the tape was actually recorded over in Poland and that he played it about a month ago on his radio show. He said that Enrique also told them that he was going to come on their show to prove that he can sing but he never showed up. Martin thinks that he won't show up for Howard's show either. Howard seems to think he will show up though.

  Howard also spent a couple of minutes discussing how the Jews were killed in Poland back in World War II. Martin told Howard that it was the Germans who killed the Jews, not the Poles. Howard said that Martin was rewriting history now. Martin said that the Poles may have killed Jews but it ''wasn't our fault.'' Howard didn't spend too much time on that though. He had Carly Simon ready to come in so he said ''Das Vidanya'' to Martin.. wrong language though.

• Carly Simon Comes In. 6/7/00. 8:05am
  Singer Carly Simon came in to promote her new album '' The Bedroom Tapes '' this morning. There was a little bit of a delay before she came in and it turned out to have something to do with the release they have guests sign. Carly came in and said that she was reluctant to sign it because in the last paragraph it says that she's willing to let them ''search her person, bags and belongings...'' and other stuff. She objected to it but Howard told her they wouldn't have searched her anyway. It's just a standard release that they have guests sign.

  After Carly got over the searching thing Howard started talking to her about other stuff like her ex-husband James Taylor. Carly is married to another guy now and has been for 11 years. She said that he's ''sort of'' white but wouldn't elaborate on that. Howard told her that he's ''octoroon'' and she said ''Me too!'' and that her grandmother was black. Howard told her that Robin's uncle was albino.

  Carly went on to talk about how divorce is violence. Not in a physical way but she said that it was violent to the psyche. Howard agreed and said that his separation screwed him up pretty good. Carly said that up in Massachusetts they have a law that ex-couples have to go to courses on how to raise children when they break up. Howard said he just goes to a shrink to get his advice.

  Howard and Carly also spent some time talking about her kids. Howard asked her if she gives her kids a lot of money. She said that they don't get much money from her at all. They both have singing careers of their own and make money doing it.

  Howard tried to get Carly to bad mouth her mother but she wasn't doing it. He heard that her mother was a hard ass and was jealous of her career but Carly just said she loved her mom. She did say that she may have been a little jealous of her popularity but she doesn't hate her for it.

  Howard was going to have Carly sing for him a little bit this morning but he first played the tape of Enrique Iglesias for her. After playing a little bit of it she said that it could have just been that he wasn't able to hear the monitors. Howard then played more of it and when it got really bad she just laughed at the tape. Howard also took a few phone calls before she sang. Everyone was kissing her ass telling her how great she is.

  Carly also told a story about living in the Boston area for a short time. She bought a house and had it renovated and shortly after that she found rats eating food off her kitchen table one morning. She also had problems with her neighbors complaining about her playing her music. After they complained she put the house on the market and moved out.

  Howard asked her if she smokes a lot of weed. She said that she does infrequently smoke some. She said she used to smoke each morning but that doesn't happen anymore.

  Howard finally got around to getting Carly to sing but she only sang for about 15 seconds. She had this plan to start off her song ''We Our Dearest Friends'' live and then move into the song on the CD. That's what she did and Howard ended up playing most of the song. After it was over they discussed what it was about. Carly told Howard what it was about.. mostly her paranoia.

  Howard spent a few more minutes talking to her about her past sex life and stuff like that. Carly ended up asking Howard how his divorce was going. He said that last Sunday would have been their wedding anniversary but they decided not to even talk to each other on that day because it would have upset both of them. He said it's very painful for both of them. He also told her that it doesn't look like they're going to get back together but they're still good friends.

  You can find out more about Carly at her web site CarlySimon.com

• Les Moonves Calls In. 6/7/00. 9:00am
  The head of CBS programming, Les Moonves, called in to talk about this new hit show ''Survivor'' that Howard has been talking up lately. Les is very proud of the show. Howard said he really likes the show even though it's just a ''Real World'' ripoff. Howard asked Les if he likes ''Survivor'' because he is a survivor himself. Les said that there are worse snakes in his industry than there are on the island that the show takes place on.

  Howard said that Les had a hand in picking the people who are on the show. Les said that he did help out a bit weeding out the final 16 people who are on the show. Howard said he didn't think he'd like having the old geezers on the show but now that he's seen a couple of episodes he thinks it's working.

  Howard mentioned seeing the people eating these bugs on the show and Les told him that those bugs are a delicacy in Malaysia where the show takes place.

  Howard also spoke to Les about a bunch of other stuff while he had him on the phone. He said that Les plays golf with President Clinton and is good friends with him. He asked Les if he's ever brought up his name to the President. Les said he hasn't. Howard requested that Les ask President Clinton to get the FCC off his ass but Les said that's not the President's thing to do. Howard thinks that Les doesn't like him for some reason. Les said that he does like him and is very proud to have him on CBS on Saturday nights.. in the major markets anyway. Howard asked Les why he never takes any shows from his production company. Les doesn't think that ''Son of the Beach'' would have worked on CBS but said that he loves the show.

  Howard also asked about what they're going to do with Bryant Gumbel's show which isn't getting any ratings in the morning. Les said they're going to just be patient and see what it does. ''He's only been on 7 months..'' Les said. A short time later a caller asked why they canceled ''Now and Again''. Les said something about having other shows they thought would do better in it's place. So they'll be patient with sucky Bryant Gumbel but they cancel good shows after just a short run. Howard went through a few more things with Les before moving on to talk to Slash.

• Slash Calls In. 6/7/00. 9:20am
  Ex-Guns N Roses guitarist, Slash, called in this morning. Howard just wanted to talk about how bad Axl's new music is and how he's still using the Guns N Roses name without the rest of the original band. Howard thinks that GNR was one of the bands he's ever heard. He asked Slash if he's bitter about the whole thing. Slash said he's really not bitter. He said he hasn't spoken to Axl in about 5 years.

  Howard also asked Slash if he's still with the ''hot-piece-of-ass girlfriend'' he was with the last time he saw him. Slash said that he's been with this girlfriend for about 4 years now. The woman Howard was thinking about was Slash's wife at the time he was filming ''Private Parts''. He divorced her and moved on to a new woman. Slash said that this new girlfriend is the only one he's ever been monogamous with and it's kind of strange for him.

  Howard asked Slash if he's financially set for life but Slash didn't really want to talk finances with him. He said he was set for life right from the beginning but who knows what that means? He's got a new album called ''Ain't Life Grand'' in the works with his band Snakepit that will be out in September.

  Howard asked Slash if he heard Axl's horrible music that was out recently. Slash wouldn't bad mouth Axl but said that the reason he left GNR was because of the direction Axl wanted to go with music.

• Enrique's Appearance Causes A Ruckus. 6/8/00. 6:05am
  Howard said that a bunch of press showed up at the station to try and get in to get tape of Enrique Iglesias performing on the show today. He's not letting anyone in. He said that the Today Show contacted the show yesterday and offered to do a simulcast on their show but Howard's not going to let them do that. What does he get out of an offer like that? He said that they'd never do anything for his show so why would he let them get an exclusive like that? He heard that the woman who made the offer was surprised that Howard turned it down. Howard is also refusing to let ''Entertainment Tonight'' or ''Access Hollywood'' come in either. Both of them screwed him over recently so he won't let them in.

  Howard said that Crazy Cabbie told him that he has even more tape of Enrique that proves that he can't sing. Howard had him come in and play the tape for him but it proved nothing. Cabbie said he got it from someone at VH-1 and even though it sounded like he was singing you could tell he was lip syncing. Howard watched it and saw what Cabbie was talking about but it really didn't prove anything.

  Howard changed the subject to talk about how strange Cabbie was the other night when he spoke to him on the phone. For some reason Howard had asked Cabbie if he'd perform a homosexual act for a million bucks. Cabbie said he would give a guy oral for a million but he wouldn't kiss him. Howard thinks that's very gay and said it was very uncomfortable to talk to Cabbie after he said that. Stuttering John asked Cabbie if he'd do other gay stuff for less money. He said he'd give hand manipulation for a measly $10,000. A lot of people think that Cabbie might be gay.. He really is the new Ralph, isn't he? Someone said he should be called Crazy Faggie instead of Cabbie.

  Gary came in and let Howard know about more of the press that wanted to come on the show. ''Extra'', a photographer from the NY Post and someone from some spanish publication wanted to come up but Howard just said "F-You'' to everyone.

  Howard also read some articles about the Enrique thing and it seems that his people have changed their stories a few times. At first they said it may have been Enrique singing while lip syncing and then they said that he may have been playing with the sound people. Finally they said that they couldn't confirm that it was actually Enrique.

  Howard took a call from a spanish woman who was really upset that Howard was making fun of this guy. She yelled at him for a few minutes and said that she wanted to come up to argue her case. Later in the show Howard let her come in and they rambled on and on about how great Enrique is and how wrong it was for Howard to try and ruin his career. He said he's not trying to ruin it, he's just playing tape of him that's funny. Howard let them stay for a few minutes but eventually kicked them out.

• NJ Governor Christine Whitman Calls In. 6/8/00. 7:20am
  The Governor of New Jersey, Christie Whitman, called in real quick this morning. She was just letting Howard know that she's backing George W. Bush for President. Howard found it surprising that she'd back him and asked her a couple of quick questions as to why she would. Howard also wanted to know if she's going to be Vice President. She doesn't think that will happen. Howard asked her if she was offered the position, would she'd take it. She said that she would have to consider it but she doesn't think that will happen. Whitman also spoke to Howard a little bit about the NJ Devils Hockey team and how they're in the playoffs. No one seems to care about it either. Whitman was only on the phone for about 5 minutes or so.

• Zubeda The Black Pamela Anderson. 6/8/00. 7:35am
  This woman Zubeda contacted the show recently and said that she's the black Pamela Anderson and that she wants a job on ''Son of the Beach''. Howard had her come in so he could check her out. Howard said she really was the black Pamela Anderson and that she's really hot. He spent a few minutes talking to her. She's a model and claims to have worked as a runway model in New York and Paris. She also says that she has acting experience in a few shows.. That hardly anyone has ever heard of. She's also been in a few music video's.. That hardly anyone has seen. She begged Howard to put her on his show so he did a quick audition with her. KC brought in a script from ''Pretty Woman'' that they did real quick. The part of the script sucked so it was hard to tell if she could act. Howard told her that he'd recommend her to the people on the show but he can't just put her on himself. She really wanted him to do that but it wasn't happening. He told her that she needs to talk more like a black woman if she wants to be on the show. She demonstrated some of that for him also. Howard let her go after telling her that he'd recommend her to the people of ''Son of the Beach.''

• Update: Dwayne The Million Dollar Jackpot.com Winner. 6/8/00. 8:00am
  The winner of the recent Jackpot.com Million Dollar Giveaway, Dwayne Allen, called in this morning. Howard wanted to get an update on what he's up to now. Dwayne got his lump-sum check yesterday and it was a whopping $300,000. Dwayne took the lump sum instead of the long term payout and Howard can't figure out why. Dwayne just wanted it all at once so that's the way he took it. They took out taxes and he ended up with the three hundred thousand. He wants to buy a house and a boat. He didn't have much to say and that was one of the problems Howard had with him. When he was interviewed after winning the money he didn't say a word. Howard thought he would be a little more excited but what can you do? Howard said they'd check back with him sometime in the future to see what he's done with his money.

• Enrique Iglesias Performs Live. 6/8/00. 8:10am
  Latin singer Enrique Iglesias came in to prove to Howard that he can actually sing this morning. When Enrique walked in even Howard was taken by his looks. Robin gave him a ''Wow!'' when she saw him and Howard told him he was a good looking guy. Howard wanted to build up to Enrique singing so he spent a few minutes talking to him about his life. He brought up Enrique's father Julio and said that he read that Julio was jealous of his son. Enrique said that wasn't true. Howard heard that when Enrique told his father that he outsells him 3 to 1, Julio refused to accept that and got very competitive with him. Enrique said that it's a healthy competition and that his father couldn't be jealous of his own son.

  Howard also learned that Enrique was raised by his mother from the age of 4 to 8 and was then brought to the United States by his father. He was then raised by his nanny. Howard asked him if he ever got laid by his nanny but Enrique just laughed. He didn't want to talk much about his sex life. Howard then tried to find out about all of the famous women his father has loved before. The only name that really came up was Diana Ross. Enrique didn't really remember seeing any other women around the house with his father.

  Howard moved ahead and brought up this controversial tape that he's been playing for the past few days. Enrique said that he hadn't heard the tape yet so Howard played it for him. Howard told him that if he wasn't able to sing today that his Grammy might be taken away from him and his $30 million record contract might be in trouble. Enrique listened and laughed as Howard played the tape for him. He joked that he thought it was a pretty good performance. He told Howard that it's possible that it was him. He said he may have just been screwing around having fun but that's not how he sings for real. He also said that it may have been a lip syncing situation where he couldn't hear himself and it just messed him up. He listened to it a couple of times to try and recognize himself but he still wasn't sure. Howard asked him if he's pissed that someone would tape him and put it out like this. Enrique said that it pisses him off because no matter how popular you are, there's always ''..some prick out there trying to pull you down.''

  Enrique's guitar player, Tony Bruno, came in and prepared to play the music while Enrique sang. Howard first went to a camera that was down on the street where a bunch of the press were waiting to come on the show. He told them that none of them are coming up. Howard did allow a fan to come in. She wanted to meet Enrique and she just about fainted when she came in the studio. She yelled and screamed for a minute until Howard told her to shut up and sit in the corner.

  Howard made sure that there were no ''gadgets'' or any voice changing things around for Enrique. Fred played a drum roll and Enrique performed a short bit of his song ''Rhythm Divine'' which is the same song that he sings on the bad tape. He was able to sing the song better than on the controversial tape but he was still off key a little bit. Howard and Robin were both impressed that he was able to sing it better than on the tape. Enrique also performed a bit of his new single ''Be With You'' from his album '' Enrique ''.

  After singing it the right way he sang it like it was done on the tape that Howard had. It definitely sounds exactly him singing on that tape Howard has been playing. Enrique was just having fun doing all of this. Howard went back to the camera that was down on the street and spoke to some guy who was holding a ''Enrique Sucks'' sign. He told Howard that Enrique gave him the finger when he saw him earlier. Enrique said that of course he did that. He didn't need to see that as he was going in to Howard's building.

  Some people were still saying that Enrique wasn't hitting the high notes in the song that he sang. Stuttering John and some phone callers all said that he wasn't that good. Howard thought that he'd proven himself already and that it was ridiculous for these people to say that. Enrique then went ahead and sang the song once again.

  Howard was ready to end the segment but Enrique said he was having fun so he kept him on a little longer. Howard got a call from his friend Shaun Robinson from ''Access Hollywood'' who he met on a flight from New York to Los Angeles recently. She was calling in trying to get her producer on the show this morning. Howard had told the woman earlier that he wasn't allowing the press up to the studio so they called Shaun and told her to try and get them in. After a couple of minutes talking to her Howard figured out what she was trying to do and got off the phone.

  A few more fans of Enrique's were allowed in the studio before he left. It was the women who were defending him earlier in the show. They spent a few minutes letting Howard goof on them for being such wacky fans. One girl was 19 and Howard told her she was getting a little old to be doing this. Another chick had left her husband and kids behind at home while she chases Enrique around.

  Finally, Howard's board operator Luis came in because he claimed that he could sing better than Enrique. Enrique challenged him to sing with him and he accepted. Enrique started the song and Luis tried to sing the high notes. He was unable to do it and his voice cracked a few times. It wasn't as easy as he thought. Howard told Enrique that he could keep his Grammy and ended the segment.

  After a commercial break Howard came back and had reporter Chaunce Hayden on the phone. He was saying that Enrique sucked and didn't hit those high notes. He wanted to know why Howard was defending him. Howard told him that Enrique proved that he sings on his own album and that's all they wanted to prove. They wanted to see if he was another Milli Vanilli and he wasn't. Howard said that he may not be the greatest singer in the world but he definitely sings on his own album. Chaunce was just trying to make a story out of something that's not a story anymore. Other people were coming in saying that Enrique wasn't that good but it didn't matter to Howard. He continued to tell them that all he wanted Enrique to prove was that he's the one on the album... and that's what he did.

• Gandalf The Wizard Clown. 6/8/00. 9:20am
  Howard heard that this clown who calls himself Gandalf the Wizard Clown can actually get laid being a clown. He thought it would be interesting so he had him on. Howard spoke to him about his dopey job and some of the things that have happened to him but the guy wasn't much of a fun guy. He was really ''sad'' sounding according to Robin. He didn't have a special clown voice going on and he was pretty mellow even though he was in full clown makeup.

  He told Howard that he's had kids expose themselves to him and has even had a gun pointed in his face doing his job. Howard told Gandalf that he's just happy to see that clowns are lower than a radio DJ. He said it makes him feel better about his own job. Gandalf claims that clowns can make between $50-75,000 a year which seemed to surprise Howard. Galdalf left the studio on a little bike and ended up falling off the thing as he was going out the door. Everyone was laughing hysterically after he fell. Gandalf has a web site at MagicForPets.com

• Various Stuff. 6/9/00. 6:05am
  Howard spent a couple of minutes talking about what a nut OJ is after hearing him arguing with Nicole Brown's sister on the Fox News channel yesterday. He said that OJ is a screwball and said that he's got to be insane. Later in the show Howard played some of the tape and said that now everyone has to think that OJ is insane. He just argues over ridiculous stuff. OJ says he wants $3 million to take a lie detector test and Howard was willing to put the money up but Robin said that OJ wants the money free and clear so that Fred Goldman can't get a hold of it. That's not really possible since all of the money OJ makes is supposed to go to the Goldmans. It's just another one of OJ's silly plans to make him seem as innocent as he thinks he should be.

  Big Black called in and played some clips from last nights news coverage of the whole Enrique Iglesias thing. Howard also spent some time talking about how Big Black pays his credit card bills with other credit cards. He has like 8 cards and just transfers his balances between them all. A listener called in and said that he's going to find out what Big Black's real name is and have his wages garnished so he can't continue to freeload off of his credit card companies. Big Black didn't take the threat seriously though. He just blew it off and will probably continue to transfer balances for the rest of his life.

  Howard had Ralph on the phone to talk about their dinner together last night. After eating Ralph decided to pay for the meal since Howard always pays. He went to the bathroom and gave his credit card to the waiter. A short time later the waiter came to the table and said that his card was no good so Howard ended up paying for the meal again. Howard thought it was funny but other people thought that he knew the card was no good and didn't plan on paying for the meal at all.

• Roger Ebert Comes In. 6/9/00. 7:05am
  257 pound movie reviewer Roger Ebert came in to promote his new book '' I Hated, Hated, Hated This Movie .'' Howard heard that it looked like Roger had gained some weight since he was on last. When Howard saw him he though he looked a little bigger than usual but Roger said he's not. He said he's actually lost weight in the past year. He's DOWN to 257 pounds. He told Howard that he's ''..down to a weight that most people would be horrified to be up to.'' 257 pounds the last time he checked. Gary thinks that he might be lying about that weight and that he might weigh even more. KC came in with a scale but Howard didn't want to put Roger through that embarrassment.

  Howard heard that Roger's TV show hasn't been renewed in the New York market so he spent a few seconds talking about that. Roger said it hasn't been renewed on the local FOX station but he thinks it will be picked up by someone for next season.

  Howard also spoke to Roger about his pubic hair. The two of them were talking about gray hair and Howard said he'd hate to have gray pubes. Roger said that he's got ''salt and pepper'' colored pubes. He doesn't like having it that way but there's not much he can do.

  Howard finally brought up Roger's book '' I Hated, Hated, Hated This Movie .'' He went through some of the movies in the book that he disagrees with. They also spoke about other movies that Roger loves and Howard hates. The movie ''High Fidelity'' was a main subject of discussion. Howard and the rest of the crew all hated the movie while Roger loved it. That was argued over quite a bit. ''Three Kings'' was also a movie that Roger loved and Howard hated. Both he and Robin said that they rushed out to see it after Roger told them it was great and they had a horrible time at it. ''Mission Impossible 2'' got a 3 star rating from Roger but, once again Howard and Robin hated it. Howard disagrees with many of Roger's hated movies like ''Ace Ventura'', ''Stuart Little'' and ''Starship Troopers''.

  After arguing about movies Howard took a few phone calls from some angry callers. They were calling him fat and telling him that his reviews are all screwy. Even Captain Janks called in and said ''Hi fatty!'' to Roger. Howard didn't like the fact that he said that but didn't hang up on him. Janks wanted to know if Roger had dated Shirley Hemphill. He said he never did. Janks had read something about it on the web and took it to be the truth.

  Roger told Howard that he should go see the animated movie ''Titan A.E.'' so that probably means Howard will hate it. Howard wanted to know about some of the other new movies that are coming out soon but Roger hasn't seen them yet. Howard wants to know about ''Hollow Man'', ''X-Men'', ''Shaft'' and ''Nutty Professor 2'' but Roger hasn't seen any of them yet.

• KC's Dilemma. 6/9/00. 7:50am
  During a commercial break KC asked Howard a question that Howard wanted him to ask on the air. He had KC talk about it when they came back. KC told Howard that he was offered $1000 to ride on a float in a gay pride parade. He doesn't know if he should do it or not. He just has to ride on it. He doesn't have to wear a thong or anything like that but he's not sure if he wants to do it or not. Gary told Howard that KC's bed recently broke so he needs money for a new one. KC said that he doesn't mind just sleeping with his mattress on the floor though. He said it's not a necessity to get a new bed. Gary told KC to do what he would do if he didn't need the money. KC said that he wouldn't ride on the float if he didn't need the money. This led to listeners calling in and calling KC gay for even considering doing the parade. He thinks it would make him more of a man if he actually did it. Former intern Gay Rich called in and told KC that he'd hold his hand the whole time he was on the float but that didn't help matters. Howard told KC to think about it and let them know what his decision is next week.

• The Gossip Game With Guest David Brenner. 6/9/00. 7:55am
  Comedian David Brenner and his new wife Elizabeth came in to play the Mike Walker gossip game this morning. David is appearing at the Foxwood Casino up in Connecticut tonight so he came in to promote that. He and his girlfriend of 13 years recently tied the knot on his HBO special which surprised a lot of people. Brenner told Howard that he had to get married because he was so used to having a totally opposite life to Howard's that he decided to marry after Howard separated.

  Howard spoke to the two of them about their sex lives for a few minutes before getting to the game. He found out from Elizabeth that David is very good in bed and very big in the pants. He delivers multiple orgasms according to Elizabeth. Howard asked her if she ever masturbates and she told him she never has to do that because David is so good. David also denied ever having to masturbate. He said he did it as a young man but not while he's been with Elizabeth. Howard doesn't believe either of them. Howard also asked them about anal sex. David said that they occasionally do that but it doesn't happen often.

  Elizabeth had a baby 2 years ago and Howard was happy to see that she snapped back pretty good. Yesterday he mentioned a study he'd read about that said women lose their looks after pregnancy so that other men won't be attracted to them. He said that ''Janet Reno has 47 kids..'' as an example. Elizabeth must have been one of the exceptions to the rule.

  After a few minutes of interview, Howard moved on to the gossip game. Each week Mike Walker calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. Here are this week's stories:

  1. While Courtney Cox was visiting a friend in the hospital a mother of a very ill child asked her to visit the kid. Courtney did so and ended up coming back for weeks to visit the dying child. She even made a visit on Christmas day.
  2. Tiny Verne Troyer, Mini-Me in ''Austin Powers'', is having a special Harley Davidson motorcycle created to fit his tiny stature.
  3. Jim Carrey's friends say that since he's hooked up with Renee Zellwegger the sizzle in his personality has vanished. She apparently complained about his public outbursts and he's laid off of them since.
  4. Jack Nicholson tried to push a pastry in his girlfriend Lara Flynn Boyle's mouth but she refused to eat it and told Jack ''That's why you look the way you do and that's why I look the way I do.'' Jack just shrugged it off and ate the pastry himself.
  David and Elizabeth went with number 4 as the false story. Robin, Jackie and Fred all went with number 2 while Howard went with number 3. The actual false story was number two. Robin is back in her winning streak.

  After the game Howard spent a couple more minutes with David and Elizabeth. David will be appearing at Foxwood Casino tonight and at the Trump Plaza Casino on July 29 in Atlantic City.

• Sinead O'Connor Comes In. 6/9/00. 8:30am
  Singer Sinead O'Connor came in to promote her new CD '' Faith & Courage '' this morning. Howard wanted to talk to her about the headlines in today's newspaper that say Sinead is now a full blown lesbian. Sinead really didn't want to talk about that much though. Sinead told Howard that she'd done an interview with the magazine ''Curve'' and they're the ones who put out a press release saying that she's now coming out of the closet as a lesbian. She said it was ''wicked'' of ''Curve'' to do something like that without even consulting her about it. She said that she has always had issues hanging over her and her music and she doesn't want that to happen with this new album.

  At first Sinead was very quiet and just wanted to promote her album. She wouldn't let Howard get a word in and just kept talking about her album while Howard would ask her questions about her life. He asked her if she had a horrible childhood.. She pushed the album. After a few minutes she finally loosened up and started talking a little bit. Howard asked her what she's worth and she actually said $3½-4 million. She said that she's not extravagant and saves her money for her kids... Then she plugged the album again.

  Howard kept bringing up the lesbian thing and she finally started talking about that. She said that she had a problem with the lesbian thing because her home country of Ireland is a very homophobic place. She said that is still an issue with her but she has tried to overcome that. She said she adores men and her best friends are men but she prefers to make love to women. She said she can relate to making love to them better. She also said that she's chosen not to be with anyone at this time. She's concentrating on her career right now.

  Sinead seemed to come to life after seeing Robin. It took a few minutes before she knew where she was and once she saw her she seemed to fall in love. Her monotone almost vanished as she said ''Oh hi!'' to Robin. She was talking to Robin and not looking at Howard so he had to ask her to look at him again. Howard was getting on her nerves and she said that guys like him ''make you want to be with women.'' Howard told Sinead that Robin once went 7 years without sex. That surprised Sinead but Robin said that she masturbated in that time quite a bit. Howard then asked Sinead if she does that. Sinead said that she does it constantly. She's not a fan of vibrators though. She prefers her right hand.

  Howard played a little bit of Sinead's first single ''No Man's Woman'' off the new album. He said that she'll be performing on ''The Late Show with David Letterman'' tonight.

  Howard finally got Sinead to talk a little bit about her childhood. Her mother had this Munchausen syndrome by proxy. That's where the parent hurts the child to get attention for herself. Howard's notes said that Sinead's mother used to beat her but Sinead wouldn't bad mouth her. She said that she loves her anyway. She said that 10 years ago she may have bad mouthed her but that was just a stage she went through. Sinead said that early in her career she may have come off as angry but it was just her tender and shy personality.

  Howard asked her if she ever smokes weed and she said she does that constantly but not as often as she masturbates. Howard saw that she's not wearing a top on the cover of her album and she told Howard that she wasn't wearing any underwear this morning. No panties and no bra. She said she's not a believer in underwear. She was having so much fun that she was smiling. Howard said he'd never seen her smile.

  Sinead also spoke a little bit about her religious beliefs and how she's a Catholic Priest.. in Ireland. There's some kind of movement over there that allows women to become Priests. Howard changed the subject by asking her if she shaves. She said that she sometimes shaves her genital area and her armpits. Now that she's not with anyone she doesn't have to maintain all of that like she usually does. At the end of it all Howard told Sinead that if she ever wants to get over the lesbian thing she just needs to call him.

• High Pitch Erik Prepares For Sex. 6/9/00. 9:20am
  Next Tuesday High Pitch Erik is going to lose his virginity to a porn star on RealPornWorld.com . He came in to get some advice from Howard this morning. Howard said Erik looked horrible this morning. He's fatter than ever and he's got some weird facial hair growing on his face. He said Erik got a crew cut and the hair on his face just looks bizarre. Howard said that the word ''repulsive'' isn't strong enough to describe him. He was wearing a tight shirt around his big fat belly that looked ridiculous. He told Erik he's just ''vile.'' Howard asked him if he looks in a mirror before he leaves the house. He said he does and he tried to stretch out the shirt after he put it on. Howard said that he could buy a bigger shirt and it would look better.

  Erik wanted some advice on what to do for his first time having sex. Howard basically just told him not to do oral with the porn star Dynamite. Use a rubber and just do it in the missionary position. He also suggested that he buy some condoms and practice putting them on to make sure he knows how to do it when he gets to it on Tuesday. He's never used one so he needs the practice. Erik told Howard that he's afraid of getting AIDS but Robin asked ''why?'' This might be the only time he ever gets laid.

  KC came in and said that he thinks Erik will screw this up somehow. Howard agrees. He said that he's heard that Erik's Cop friends don't think he'll be able to perform because he might be gay. Erik thinks that he'll come through and will bring the tape in after he's done it.

  A listener called in and asked why Erik was on the show. He was supposed to be banned from it after he lost the race against Crazy Cabbie. Howard said that Erik is just too good to keep off the show.

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